i am still in the same shit with you...going through different days...
and its getting harder and harder to untangle myself in this cobweb...
i hate it that i am such a lying bitch in front of everyone about you or about how i feel for you
i hate it that i am hurting now...
its so hard giving up what i have with you now even if its just bits and pieces...
i hate it that you worry about me because it endears you more to me..
all of me hopes that its me that you will choose in the end but God there is no way that is going to happen...
lord...is this a test again? your letting me give up the things that makes me run this days...
you are making me give up the things that makes me happy and that is the community...
i dont understand...
i dont know how i would be able to explain, or to justify what i needed to do and what i must do to the community...
but i also cannot be the hypocrite that i am right now about this love...
arghhhhhhh!
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